Prepare yourself for loads of Brexit fibs in the election campaign

Truth and lies about Brexit

In Northern Ireland last week, Boris reached new heights of brazen bullsh*t. He told what was a small group of Tory supporters that there was no need for any customs documents from Northern Ireland because of his fantastic Brexit deal. He even went as far as to say that if anyone told businesses any different, they should call the Prime Minister who would tell them to throw away the customs documents they had been asked to complete. There are several things wrong with Boris’s rant. First, by saying that people could call the new Prime Minister, he is assuming that in a few weeks that he will be PM. That’s far from certain. Secondly, what Boris said was the complete opposite to what his Brexit Secretary told Parliament in response …

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Boris reckons he’ll have Brexit wrapped up by Christmas

The race is on for sorting Brexit out by being the first to get to Downing Street

We all knew it was coming and, sure enough, Boris pushed through a bill in Parliament to allow a General Election to take place in just 38 days from now. It should not go unnoticed, though, that in spite of suggestions to allow 16 and 17 year-olds to vote, this was blocked. Strange that Boris himself was elected by such teenagers as they were allowed to vote in the Tory leadership contest a few months ago. One rule for Boris, another for the rest of us? Boris’s plan is to get a stonking great majority so that he can push through Brexit without opposition. Sound familiar? Yes, that’s the same plan Theresa May chose last year. Whatever happened to her? You may have noticed that Boris is just repeating what …

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Halloween horror for Boris’s Brexit

Halloween horror for Boris's Brexit

It’s going to be a nightmare week of horrors for Boris and his botched Brexit plans. There will be no treats for him, or us this week. And he’ll try playing several tricks, which are doomed to fail. Brexit clearly will not happen on 31st October, in spite of Bonking Boris saying it will definitely happen and if it doesn’t he’ll be dead in a ditch. What is guaranteed is that on 1st November, when Brexit hasn’t occurred, the radio and TV stations will be playing clip after clip after clip of Boris saying that Brexit would definitely happen on 31st October. You only have to remember Theresa May’s failed attempt at Brexit in March. She repeatedly said that it would definitely happen back then. It didn’t, of course, and …

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Schoolboy error by Boris on Brexit

Eton college

Yesterday you could almost hear the “ner, ner, ne ner ner” taunting from Bonkers Boris after he “didn’t” send the required letter to the EU requesting an extension of the Article 50 deadline. “Super Saturday” turned out to be anything but. Instead, it was “Shambles Saturday” because the latest Withdrawl Bill was stopped in its tracks by an amendment put forward by “Leaky Letwin”. (He once claimed over £2,000 as “Parliamentary Expenses” to repair a leaking pipe under his home tennis court.) The acceptance of the amendment meant that the “Withdrawal Agreement Bill” could not proceed and so Boris would have to obey the existing law and send a letter to the EU requesting an extension. (By the way, did you know that in parliamentary circles the “Withdrawal Agreement Bill” …

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There is more than one pathway to Brexit

Multiple pathways to Brexit

Apparently there’s a pathway to Brexit. We know because Boris the Bonker told us so. Last week, he spent the day at a wedding venue near Liverpool where he had met Dr Leo Varadkar to sort out the UK’s divorce from the EU. He didn’t appear to spot the irony. Indeed, he probably didn’t spot much because the pictures show Boris walking through the woodland staring at the ground, while Lanky Leo (6ft 4in tall) tried to make eye contact. There is, of course, a pathway that the Irish Taoiseach wants to follow. He has spotted Boris’s plainly poor plan of blaming everyone else for a botched Brexit. If Dr Varadkar had emerged from his final talks with Bonkers Boris all glum, it would provide ammunition in the coming weeks …

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Boris’s Brexit plan might work: and he does not want that to happen..!

Brexit and the Northern Ireland border

Boris the Bonker has a problem: it looks like his plan to leave the EU before 31st October MIGHT be able to happen. And that was NOT the plan. His plan was revealed in an interview on BBC Radio Four this week. It turns out he confided in the interviewee a couple of months ago about his real strategy. The plan is to confuse, to bluster, to promise to leave but make opposition MPs angry and the EU even more frustrated. That is intended to either halt Brexit or to force another delay. Boris will then be able to turn to the country saying, “Look, I promised, but I was unable to meet my commitment to you because I was stopped by the dreadful MPs and the horrible EU”. His …

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Brexit is not a walk in the park

Brexit - is it a walk in the park?

Last week, the mysterious master of the mayhem emanating from Downing Street, Dominic Cummings, was recorded as saying “Brexit is a walk in the park”. The next day he was challenged about that and was recorded as saying “Who said it was like a walk in the park?” The journalist said “You, Mr Cummings” to which Dangerous Dominic merely replied “No”. Either the chief adviser to Boris has an abysmal memory (which is not suitable for someone advising at such a high level), or he lied. Fibbing is not new to Number Ten or Boris. We should not be surprised. However, in spite of the entire nation knowing that Bonking Boris has a strange relationship with the truth, he still enjoys widespread support. Millions of people appear to think he …

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A supreme example of Brexit nonsense again this week

The Supreme Court London

I never thought I would need to write this. However, I have to say that I now realise that the Supreme Court of the United Kingdom is biased. In deciding that Bonkers Boris had prorogued parliament illegally, Lady Hale and her judicial chums exhibited complete and undeniable bias. The Supreme Court judges were clearly biased in favour of the rule of law. They were also biased in favour of Governments having to abide by that law. Plus, the judges were obviously biased in support of the sovereignty of parliament. Yet, the outcry against the “undemocratic” judgement and the totally arrogant “strong disagreement” with the ruling by Boris the Bonker is amazing. The very people who voted “leave” in order to “restore the sovereignty of our parliament” are the ones who …

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Another chaotic week in Brexit Land

Boris Johnson is happy to speak outdoors against a noisy backdrop

Bonkers Boris batted a blinder this week. The media went crazy, saying how he had been deliberately snubbed and humiliated by the Prime Minister of Luxembourg. Cabinet ministers lined-up to say how badly the UK had been treated. It all played into the hands of Boris because it allowed a cynical “us” versus “them” narrative. It enabled Boris the Bonker’s mates to tell us “this is why we need to get out of the EU”. However, we need to take it all with a megadose of salt. Remember, apart from a couple of small examples, the bulk of the British media is “pro Brexit”. So you don’t always get the exact story. Here’s what happened. Several days before the visit to Luxembourg various teams at Number Ten would have been …

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Boris is a lying, cynical, political opportunist – according to his mate

Boris Johnson and David Cameron before Brexit divided them

Boris Johnson did not lie to the Queen. We know so because he told us he didn’t. Oh, hang on, that might be a lie. After all, he has lied to us many times and doesn’t seem to care about it. So why should we believe him when he says that he told Her Majesty the truth about the need to prorogue Parliament? Add to that, the revelations from his mate David Cameron this weekend where he says in his new 752-page book, “For the Record”, that Boris is a great big fibber. He accuses the Bonker of only siding with Brexit because it would help his career ambitions. “Boris rode the bus round the country, he left the truth at home,” says Mr Cameron. None of this is any …

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